ULTIMATE EGGNOG (AGE 1MO-1YR, SRSLY)

The recipe is from a party in 1920's Shanghai. My personal variation uses on SNAP for additional spice, but this original rules any holiday party
  1. Dozen egg yolks
    Save the whites for miserable, healthy breakfasts when you wake up feeling guilty about your eggnog consumption
  2. 2 cups sugar
  3. 4 cups whole milk
  4. 1 cup heavy cream
    No one said this was going to be easy
  5. 1 liter bourbon
    This is why it can — and must — be aged. No bacteria and few party guests can tolerate this much bourbon
  6. 3/4 cup brandy
  7. 1/2 cup dark Jamaican rum
    It is going to seem hilarious dropping 2oz of Myers into this enormous cauldron of cheer, but do it anyway