Learning to Stop Apologizing
- •I am not sorry for being right.I have apologized in so many conversations and emails and the like when I didn't actually do anything wrong, but wanted to ease the tension of pointing out someone else's mistake or tell someone why their request was unreasonable, uninformed, or impossible. I have to remind myself not to apologize. I'm a professional and can stand up for myself without adding a smiley face to make sure people don't think I'm angry.
- •I am not sorry because YOU bumped into MEEnough said.
- •I am not sorry I don't have tiny, girly handsThis one seems silly, but for some odd reason I wished my hands were smaller when I was younger. Never again. I have long fingers and palms made for gripping things. My hands are not here to make yours feel big and strong in comparison. I have got to stop feeling guilty for taking up space. If that matters to you I guess my penis must be bigger than yours.
- •I am not sorry for not meeting your expectationsI've had a couple of friendships fall apart in the last few years because, after years of friendship, they were suddenly at a breaking point because I never met some silent expectation they had of me for all this time. Don't befriend someone with an asterisk in your head that says "this will be great as long as they _____". I'm not saying that I don't advocate personal growth, but I don't need friends who look at me and think I'd be great if only I would do something different.
- •I am not sorry for saying noI don't want to have sex with you - don't have to be sorry about it. I don't want you to invite yourself over to my house - don't have to be sorry about it. I don't want to do a juice cleanse with you - don't have to be sorry about it. I don't want to lend you my notes because you skipped class - you've never talked to me before and I don't have to be sorry about it.
- •I am not sorry for liking thingsI am not sorry that I'm 23 and love spider-man and that seems like something that an adult woman should grow out of. I'm not sorry that I reread the Harry Potter books every summer and I'm not sorry for arguing with you about the merits of so called young adult fiction. I'm not sorry that I enjoy watching romantic comedies AND Tarantino AND science fiction. I'm not sorry that I like Justin Bieber and Taylor Swift. Stop putting people in boxes. Stop deciding what people are allowed to like.