1. Use my company's Instagram to like my own photos
  2. Spend excessive amounts of time editing with one of the 70 photo apps I own
  3. Delete pictures that don't get very many likes
  4. Time my posts to what I have learned through trial and error are the most active times of the day hashtag sunset
  5. Have more posts than I have followers
  6. Visit art exhibitions and try to steal the popularity of people who are actually talented
  7. Semi-seriously considered paying for fake followers from one of those spammy websites called like Instagramfollow3rZ4u.com that are always @ing me
  8. Constantly embarrass/annoy my boyfriend by rearranging all the plates and cups on the table and standing up to do overhead shots every time we go anywhere
  9. Use a lot of hashtags then go back and delete them later to pretend I'm not that sort of person #ireallyamthough
  10. Keep careful count of how many followers I have but then pretend I don't know like "oh around fifteen hundred or something like that I never really look"
  11. Get personally offended when I lose a follower