HOW TO PROPOSE TO SOMEONE IN LOS ANGELES WITHOUT ACTUALLY HAVING TO GET MARRIED

  1. "Want to get engaged?"
  2. "Want to spend the rest of our lives together?"
  3. "Want to grow old together?"
  4. "Let's get a dog together!"
  5. "Will you be my fiancée?"
  6. "Let's get a house in Eagle Rock!"
  7. "Want to get crystals for the house in Eagle Rock?"
  8. "Let's get another dog!"
  9. "I'd be open to a poly-amorous arrangement."
  10. "Let's go to couples therapy!"