THINGS I DO BEFORE I ACTUALLY WRITE
Because procrastination is the incubation of conceptualization.
- 1.Think about how today is the day I will write the best thing I've ever written!!!
- 2.Eat food. Snack on shit. I could have just eaten a feast, it doesn't matter. Sometimes rice crackers because the crunch is spectacular.
- 3.Stare at the daddy long legs crawling along my dusty ceiling in most rooms of my house.
- 4.Look at myself in the mirror to say, "This is it. It's go time mothafucka!" (I don't literally say this aloud, do not be alarmed. Or do I?!?!?)
- 5.See what my friends from home are up to on Facebook/Twitter.
- 6.Re-order the TV shows I need to catch up on in my mental queue.
- 7.Swipe right at least 5 times on Hinge, Jdate (where my Jews at?!), and or Tinder.
- 8.Eat something sweet. Preferably this other worldly delight:
- 9.Realize it's been over two hours since I promised myself I would start writing.
- 10.Tell myself I should smile more.
- 11.And... I write.