THE VAST AND HUMOROUS LIST OF WAYS I HAVE ALMOST DIED
This is just a friendly reminder that it can happen anywhere, anytime. (Edit: man, machines are horrible.)
- •When I hit my head on the corner of a table when I was 2 while playing with this -
- •The year after, when I was 3 I got hit in the bad on accident by a piñata. (Trump style)
- •When I fell down a set of stairs when I was 6 because I was trying to dance down the stairs like I was Fred Astaire.
- •When I was 11 I smacked into a wall right into a side of a house going full speed rollerblading downhill. (I was trying to be a Soulskater)
- •When I was into Fast&Furious Tokyo drift and almost drifted into a barrier divide on the freeway.
- •When I got into a serious car accident when I was 20.
- •When I was 25 and almost drove straight onto an oncoming train.
- •That same year, the airplane myself and my girlfriend took had a malfunction and the airplane started smoking so we had to do an emergency landing.