10 stages of getting through a bad day, as illustrated by Nick Cage.
N.C. can get us through anything.
- 1.You wake up in the morning and get ready for the day. You look in the mirror- hey, I look just fine today.Good for you, champ. You step out into that world, friend.
- 2.You walk into Starbucks and the cute barista smiles at you. Suddenly, you own this world. It's yours.The barista smiles at everyone, but shh, you do you. #respect
- 3.You walk into work with the confidence of a much more successful man, and throw out whatever HILARIOUS joke pops in your mind.Yes, that includes pretending to be a vampire to your coworkers. It's not great.
- 4.Grabbing coffee from the kitchen, you hear it. "Oh my god, his vampire joke wasn't even THAT funny. Totally As If."Your coworkers are low-key from 1997.
- 5.You sit back at your cube, furious at the world. This entire day has become horse shit.So many phone calls to make—so much fury.
- 6.Your anger morphs into an all-encompassing depression as you hide in the bathroom, praying you open your eyes and it's somehow time for bed.It's 9:30 AM.
- 7.You stand up and look yourself in the bathroom mirror. You tell yourself to pull it the fuck together.You're a grown-ass man. Get it together.
- 8.You walk out of the bathroom to find your coworkers are RETELLING YOUR SUPER-FUNNY VAMPIRE JOKE TO A WHOLE NEW GROUP OF PEOPLE.You pretend to laugh along, the seeds of vengeance taking root in your mind.
- 9.You decide to make a grandiose plan to win back the respect of your peers, yelling it to everyone within earshot as you storm out of the building at 10 am.No one even turns. You pull this same shit every day. (How have you not been fired yet?)
- 10.You go home and watch Netflix for the next 12 hours before blowing yourself a good night kiss, proud of the day you've had.Thanks, Nick 😘😘😘