1. So I started taking Pristiq in December
    I'm taking it for severe depression and anxiety during PMS. Which is frustrating because I was ~okay~ (not quite undepressed but okay) the rest of the month. I have a history of anxiety, minor depression & an eating disorder that I'm pretty recovered from.
  2. I was terrified
    My body reacts to any side effect possible. Honestly I had issues with a high dose of vitamin D before. This is why I'm not taking birth control. Also, I had tried antidepressants before. But, as most probably know, Prozac isn't ideal for an 18 year old with anorexia. I wasn't able to handle it, I had suicidal ideations for the first time on Prozac.
  3. But, after a few months, it seems like they're working.
  4. Exhibit one: this morning
    I shattered my phone screen right before I had to go to work. I was already running late. Normally, I would have cried, had a panic attack and tried to figure out a way to not go to work. Today, I calmly set up at appointment at the Apple Store, got dressed and left for work. I also, without having a panic attack, managed to return home to get something I forgot, even though I was two blocks away.
  5. Exhibit two: creativity
    I struggled a lot through depression with creativity. I couldn't write. I can now, more than I used to be able to. It feels so good.
  6. Exhibit three: reading
    I had zero focus pre-antidepressant. I'm actually able to sit down and finish books now. I didn't even notice it was happening before, but that's depression. It sneaks up on you in weird ways.
  7. Exhibit four: moodiness
    During PMS, I'd pick fights with my boyfriend a lot. I don't anymore. I'm sometimes still grumpy or sad, but normal levels.
  8. Exhibit five: I still have emotions
    I heard a lot from people that going on antids made them feel like a zombie. Yeah, sometimes I'm tired. But I don't feel like I can't emote. I went through a ton of therapy before making the decision to go on the drugs, which not a ton of people do. I think that's how I know they're right for me. I worked on my mental health in ways I could control. But I can't control chemicals.
  9. Exhibit six: I feel like myself again
    When I was depressed, I felt like I was missing a part of me. I was no longer ~Alicia~ I figured it was just growing up. Guess not because I feel back to being me again.
  10. So I guess they're working. I feel like I've learned not to be so afraid of medication.
  11. Honestly this kind of information was not out there when I went looking.
  12. So I hope it helps someone?
  13. Don't be ashamed! Mental illness is so normal! Get the help that helps you!
  14. ✨💖✨💖✨💖✨💖✨