FREAKS & GEEKS CHARACTERS, RANKED

I will probably offend some people. But, like, hear me out.
  1. 1.
    Bill Haverchuck
    In a world of aching desire for approval, Bill is a teenager unafraid to be who he is despite how it comes across. He sticks up for his friends, he thinks French kissing is gross, and he's found his own personal sanctuary in grilled cheese, Entenmanns' & Garry Shandling. Most of us spend our whole lives finding that - peace with ourselves. DEFINING MOMENTS: TV-Watching Session, His Dancing, 7 Minutes in Heaven, Getting Drunk, Bionic Woman (duh), The Prank Call, Anaphylactic Shock
  2. 2.
    Lindsay Weir
    I think everyone can see their journey in Lindsay's. She embodies what the process of finding your own place actually feels like -- what it really means to critically engage the world. It's way less outwardly rewarding. Her existential crisis hit me so hard when I first watched the show -- I will always love F&G for extending to me that olive branch. DEFINING MOMENTS: Grandma's Death, Smashing Pumpkin, Mathletes, Dog's Dream, Dead Heading
  3. 3.
    Sam Weir
    Sam is relatable-y innocent. He's got the baby sibling syndrome (a thing I'm also guilty of) so he's kinda whiny and indignant. But he'll grow out of it. Mostly. DEFINING MOMENTS: Egg On His Face, Blue Dot, Parisian Night Suit, Dr. Love
  4. 4.
    Ken Miller
    He can be a jackass and a perv. I don't find it funny or endearing -- there is no “Boys will be boys” mantra in my book. But then he falls for someone who calls him out on his shit and I love that! He's secure enough to not feel threatened by it. Amy is a fierce character, and their relationship is precious. DEFINING MOMENTS: Owning at Quarters, Tuba Girl, Smashing Guitar
  5. 5.
    Neal Schweiber
    Oh Neal. Buddy. It's too much. And I think you know it. The problem is... I really don't think he's going to grow out of it. He's going to grow up to be Jonah from “Veep.” Right? DEFINING MOMENTS: Girls Don't Get Horny, Ventriloquism, Garage Door, Pretending to Be Unphased by Porn, Backseat Mascoting
  6. 6.
    Nick Andopolis
    This man is a full-fledged stalker. But Lady L is a masterpiece. DEFINING MOMENTS: Lady L, Disco Performance, Dimension Audition, “You Gotta Find Your Drum Kit”
  7. 7.
    Daniel Desario
    Daniel Desario is disgusting. In every sense. Like, SHOWER. OR WASH YOUR HAIR. ONE TIME. And then all he does is manipulate Kim or Lindsay or both. He's scum who constantly fails at impersonating DeNiro. Pass. Hard pass. DEFINING MOMENTS: Track 3, Getting Slapped, Nose Piercing, Carlos the Dwarf