ALL THE TIMES WE STOPPED ON THIS CAR TRIP

We only stopped twice on the way up.
  1. On the way out of town, to say goodbye to my grandmother.
  2. For breakfast in Wilmington
  3. Gas in Cincinnati.
  4. For a bathroom break in Florence, Kentucky. Even though, hello, we just stopped in Cincinnati.
  5. While on a detour due to an overturned tractor trailer, to get a sandwich from the trunk.
  6. At a Wendy's in Mammoth Cave, Kentucky—because trunk sandwich wasn't good enough.
  7. Not a stop, just a quick pass by Dinosaur World and the now-abandoned Fudge Chalet.
  8. Then, in Nashville, for crunchy snacks and fuel.
  9. Memphis: to buy swimsuits for the children, and to check into a motel. Both decisions= regrettable.
  10. Next morning, for breakfast at Brother Juniper's, which is not exactly on the way and has a 45-minute wait.
  11. Gas station.
  12. Redbox, to get a movie for the kids.
  13. On the on-ramp to I-55 South, when I realized the trunk was partially open.
  14. On the actual I-55 South, when OH MY GOODNESS it's the THE GRACELAND EXIT!
  15. Graceland. Drove by the mansion, then idled in the taxi stand while kids ran as close as they could to Elvis's airplanes, which are enclosed by a tall fence. No money changes hands, this is a victory. Back on the road, listening to the Elvis channel.
  16. Bathroom break.
  17. Gas break.
  18. Lunch break in Mississippi, the kids sit at a table by themselves.
  19. Almost stopped at the Tomato Museum, but didn't.
  20. Somewhere deep in Mississippi, when someone had to go #1,
  21. Then, in Baton Rouge, when the same someone had to go #2
  22. Then, we crossed the Mississippi River and I told everyone there would be no more stops.
  23. Then we got on the super-long basin bridge where you literally cannot stop.
  24. Then we were home.
  25. So we stopped.