TODAY'S RED-ALERT, FIVE-ALARM, ALL-OUT PANIC MOMENT

  1. When my mom accidentally shared a terrible Facebook post rebuking "the Left's godless liberal agenda."
  2. And all of us, in our respective time zones, had to get on speakerphone:
  3. My mom
    "I commented at the bottom but you can't see that now! Why doesn't my Facebook work? What did you do to it?"
  4. My dad
    "Where is the button? Who's computer is this? Barbara, go in Cindy's office and ask if she knows how to do this. I'm clicking...wait...NO I DON'T WANT TO RECEIVE NOTIFICATIONS FOR THIS POST. You've really done it, Barbara. You have done it."
  5. My sister
    "HELP HER DELETE IT. ALLISON TELL HER HOW TO DO IT I CAN'T DEAL WITH THIS RIGHT NOW THE KIDS ARE GETTING OFF THE BUS AND WE HAVE TO TAKE BUCKY TO THE VET."
  6. And me...
    "Didn't I tell you that you're not tech-savvy enough to bring down Donald Trump with your personal Facebook account? I am now in a full body sweat and yes I will log in for you and take care of it WHY DO YOU HAVE 94 NOTIFICATIONS THOUGH?"
  7. And delete it.
    So close.