CHILDHOOD CRUSHES

Tbh all of these crushes were passionately reawakened while making this list.
  1. Tony Toponi from "An American Tail"
    That floppy hair... that Brooklyn accent... that general "if I weren't a small mouse I'd be in Newsies" vibe... totally irresistible.
  2. This dude who really liked Crocodile Dundee's jacket in "Crocodile Dundee II"
    I don't really know what his deal was or why I was allowed to see this movie as a little one, but I definitely remember quoting him a lot and thinking he was cute. Have since learned his name was Rat. One of my more questionable crushes.
  3. Adrien Brody in "King Kong"
    Not even an 11-year-old is immune to the seductive power of Adrien Brody murmuring "isn't it obvious?"
  4. Angelo from "Shadows in the Glasshouse" (an American Girl History Mystery)
    Even if "sexual tension" wasn't a thing I knew about then, I could still feel something burning between Angelo and Merry and I was THERE for it. Plus, just think about those glass worker forearms!
  5. Tony Danza in "Angels in the Outfield"
    If Tony Danza ever found out how many wistful nights I spent as a 5-year-old planning our wedding he probably wouldn't have been as weirded out as if he found out how many wistful nights I spent imagining myself as his beautiful widow when his character died from lung cancer.