Stages You Go Through When Your Lab Partner Is Useless

*Nerd list alert*
  1. Some preface to this rage list:
  2. I'm deep in the midst of an important group research project for a class I'm in
  3. The topic we chose to research is ALS
    And in case anyone missed the memo from the ice bucket shenanigans, we don't know a whole lot about this disease compared to others
  4. Our experiment *that I did all the background research to come up with* is complicated
    Like, yesterday I was explaining to the prof what we had been up to and he said "Wow...that's...sophisticated", like he didn't think we had the mental capacity to even try this (which tbh it may not work at all cuz science is hard y'all)
  5. It has to do with crossing different genetic mutations into ALS model worms and observing them at different developmental stages
  6. And worms age quickly (like egg to adult in 3 days) so we have to check on them every day, sometimes multiple times a day
    And we have to do tests and gather data which is tedious takes SO MUCH TIME
  7. ANYYYWWAAAAYYY
  8. The point of this list is...
  9. I HAVE BEEN DOING ALL THIS SHIT BY MYSELF
  10. And in case you hadn't caught on...this project is hard!
    And my lab skillz were basically nothing before I started this class
  11. Where is my partner when I'm in lab at 11p on a Tuesday chillin with the worms even though I have an exam the next morning?
  12. NOT FUCKING THERE
  13. Why? Because she has other stuff to do right now and she'll come by later...
    As if I don't also have other classes and projects to do as well. Bitch, there is no later I need you NOW
  14. So how have I been handling this?
  15. 1. With a false sense of my abilities
    Who needs her? Not me. I'm brilliant.
  16. 2. Slowly realizing this is a lot of work for one person but pretending it's okay and you can handle this
  17. 3. Ranting to your friends about this garbage human
  18. 4. Start hating your friends a lil bit for asking why you won't go out with them on a Saturday night
    Obviously I need to transfer my worms to a new plate or they will starve by Monday because ain't nobody else gonna do it. Valid excuse imo
  19. 5. Have a small mental breakdown
  20. 6. Consider dropping out and disappearing in the woods
  21. Meanwhile your lab partner keeps saying she'll meet you at a certain time but doesn't show up until 3 hours later
    Girl I already finished gtfo
  22. 7. Receive much encouragement from the TA who is impressed by the progress of your study
    But don't rat out partner because technically she hasn't done nothing and snitches get stitches
  23. 8. Have something not work and run out of will power to problem solve
  24. 9. Live in denial and assume everything will sort itself out if you keep working hard
  25. So that's where I'm at
  26. I don't even know what this list was for
  27. I just have a lot of feelings
  28. I'm exhausted
  29. But there is always the chance that I'll learn something new about ALS that no one has ever tried before
  30. So that's cool I guess
  31. I wish I had the energy to care at this point