TOP 10 REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES (IN ORDER OF POTENTIAL PRESIDENCY)

  1. Jeb Bush BC I kinda dig his brother. He made peanut butter sandwiches with WJC while waiting to go into Mandela's funeral BC they were so hungry
  2. Jeb Bush BC I kinda dig his dad too. We all may have different philosophies but kindness is kindness.
  3. Insert major delta
  4. Rand Paul BC he buys his own shit so that makes him sort of authentic
  5. Lindsay Graham BC he might come out in order to get moderates
  6. Ted Cruz BC I think the SNL skits will be amazing
  7. Santorum BC he was such a dick to Teresa Heinz - calling her out for using Prozac after her husband died in a plane crash that I hope she starts a superpac to destroy him
  8. Carly Fiorina BC her ads against Barbara Boxer were really hilarious (Boxer as a floating balloon head) - LUV U 4EVA Barbara. Also her demon sheep ad. Check them out.