Things That Happened to Me on the Subway Ride Yesterday

  1. A woman screamed at everyone to get out of her way because she was getting out at Union Square and she can't miss her stop.
  2. She said "you're in my way!" To me and I moved and said "I'm sorry" she replied "I DONT WANT YOUR APOLOGIES IM SICK OF ALL OF YOUR DAMN APOLOGIES"
  3. I also got off at Union Square.
  4. Three sassy Puerto Rican men were rushing to hop the L and once we were all on, one yells "Rolando!!! Are we going to Brooklyn?!"
  5. Rolando doesn't know.
  6. "Yes you are on your way to Brooklyn" I say.
  7. "ROLANDO ESTAS FUCKING RETARDED" guy says.
  8. A little boy licks his hands and does a dance for his mom.
  9. A different boy screams in delight "IM GOING APPLE CRAZY"
  10. I hesitantly get off the train at 1st Ave and as I'm walking to the exit, I look into the train and wonder what circus I'm missing--- I see my ex-boyfriend two cars away.