ALTERNATIVES FOR BACON

Some ways to enjoy bacon without that scary outcome of cancer.
  1. Lube
  2. Coffee
  3. Deodorant
  4. Soap
  5. Sunscreen
  6. Chapstick
  7. Mints
  8. Condoms
  9. Bandaids
  10. Toothpaste
  11. Casket
    In case you can't give up real bacon. You'll find me here, eventually.