WHY THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL THAT DANIEL IS EARL HICKEY

From this list: ME IN 3 CHARACTERS
  1. Earl is a redneck.
  2. Daniel is not.
  3. Earl likes blondes.
  4. Daniel likes brunettes.
    💁🏻
  5. Earl has a mustache.
  6. Daniel has a beard or nothing at all.
    No mustaches on their own allowed.
  7. Earl won the lottery.
  8. Daniel will never win the lottery.
  9. Earl's brother is a lovable idiot.
  10. Daniel's brother is a lovable smartass.
    ??? This is the nicest way I could say it???
  11. Earl believes in karma.
  12. I don't think D believes in karma.
  13. Earl's wife cheated on him and left him.
  14. Not gonna happen.