1. Drinking 4 beers over 5-1/2 hours won't get you buzzed but it will get you super hungover the next day.
  2. I can no longer function on 4 hours of sleep as I did in my early 20s.
  3. Surprisingly, a diet of cakes and cupcakes doesn't sound as awesome as it did when I was a child.
  4. Grilled cheese does not equal "real" food anymore.