Things That Should be Rebooted

My dear friend Terp, shared the news on Facebook that the classic movie The Crow is getting a reboot. I've never seen it, but I can think of many other things that actually need to be rebooted.
  1. The Epic of Gilgamesh
    I want a happy ending or I'd settle for the version in the school's textbooks acknowledging that Gilgamesh was actually homosexual. That'd be nice.
  2. My Work Computer
    My Thinkpad is nearly six years old and it takes forever to start up. I need to do it, but I also don't hate myself that much at 6:45 in the morning.
  3. 2016
    This entire year sucks. I hate it. Let's start over.
  4. The Mongol Empire
    I love the Mongols, but they really had that whole "religious tolerance" thing down pat. Let's see if we can bring that back. It's such an old concept that it has to come back into vogue eventually, right?
  5. Star Wars Episodes I-III
    They're like the 2016 of cinema.
  6. Goodfellas
    I just saw this movie for the first time and I wish Karen had just shot Henry.
  7. Alias
    It is such a good idea, and then I don't know what happened the last few seasons.
  8. The Avatar: The Last Airbender movie
    Oh god, it's like rubbing really coarse sand in my eyes.