14 QUESTIONS, RANKED

Specifically, audience questions from work-related conference calls and live meetings.
  1. 14.
    Hello?? Is anyone else on the call yet?
  2. 13.
    Can you put that link in the IM feed?
  3. 12.
    Can you repeat that phone number?
  4. 11.
    I can't hear anyone? Hello? Have you started yet?
  5. 10.
    Are you collecting the questions and answers in the IM feed so you can give us an FAQ document?
  6. 9.
    Is there a number we can call to listen to the presentation? I can't hear anything?
  7. 8.
    Who put the whole call on hold so all we hear is your hold music?
    Who's the knucklehead? Oh, right, they can't hear us asking because they put us on hold!
  8. 7.
    Can whoever is chewing please mute your phone? Because we can hear you eating lunch.
    And it's kind of gross.
  9. 6.
    I joined late; can you explain xxx (which was covered in excruciating detail in the first eight minutes of the call)?
  10. 5.
    I can't see the presentation? Are you sharing your screen yet?
  11. 4.
    Can whoever has the barking dog please mute your phone?
    😬
  12. 3.
    Can we get a copy of the speakers' notes?
  13. 2.
    Will the PowerPoint be shared with us?
  14. 1.
    Can we get a copy of the slides?