SOME (UNFORTUNATELY NOT ALL) OF THE JOBS I'VE HAD

  1. Fast food
    KFC and Burger King. I've done my time. I still don't think fast food employees deserve $15 an hour.
  2. Hospitals
    Labor and Delivery and Cardiac and now I'm in a Level 1 Trauma ER, which is exactly as insane as you'd imagine. It's made me a very cynical person though so if anyone would like to save me and cast me in their tv show...heyyyy.
  3. Call Center
    I collected bad debts and often felt like Satan's little helper. It was the first and only job I've had with a cubicle and it sucked out my soul.
  4. EMT
    Not an ambulance driver. (I had too many speeding tickets so I wasn't covered by my employers insurance.) It had its perks but wearing a uniform and not knowing if I was going to be able to shower other people's bodily fluids off of me during a 48 hour shift kind of sucked.
  5. Walmart
    The place where I went to hear "it wouldn't hurt to smile" as I bagged their groceries, preparation-H and pregnancy tests.
  6. Grocery store inventory
    I counted boxes of cereal all day and yes, it was as bad as it sounds.
  7. Home healthcare
    Among my best clients where the woman who kept her dead dog in the freezer and the woman who gave her poodle human-shaped vitamins and let it bite me.