1. I woke up.
  2. I wasn't super tired because I actually slept well.
  3. I got ready for work.
  4. I put the ingredients for my green smoothie into my blender.
  5. Spinach
  6. Peaches
  7. Pineapple
  8. Mandarin oranges
  9. Strawberries
  10. Chia seeds
  11. I blended it up to the perfect consistency.
  12. So smooth and the perfect shade of green.
  13. I got down a mason jar because today I'm not feeling considerate and I don't care if the color makes you nauseous, Barbara! 🤗
  14. I lifted it out to pour it into the jar...
  15. ...
  16. The bottom fell out.
  17. Goodbye green smoothie.
  18. Goodbye Kitchen Aid Blender.
  19. Goodbye husband who suggested I try to salvage what I could instead of throwing a tantrum.
  20. Goodbye cruel world.