Danielle wanted this list
  1. Immediately when you come out of the shower.
    You are clean at that point. Don't waste a good fart then. Also it's just a wet fart and it feels sloppy. If for some reason you do then please jump right back into the shower
  2. If you are in a wedding party and you aren't the bride or the groom.
    That's a bad time to fart. It brings attention to you and if it stinks you won't stop laughing. This is not your day.
  3. Right after a big BBQ meal.
    It's a gamble at that point. You eat all this delicious BBQ and then it should be a "no fart zone" for almost 2 hours. Let your body decide the course of the BBQ. Not you with farts.
  4. If you are stuck in any sort of tube.
    I'm sure you aren't often stuck in a tube but when you are DO NOT FART. Can't stress this enough.
  5. When you are trying on new pants in a store.
    You may think this is a great time to do it. Nope. To many people around wanting to know what you think of the pants. Also you are trapped in a dressing room and it's only you in that dressing room (similar to above tube rule). Also a good fart in your good worn in pants is better than a good fart in new pants. It just is.