Silence is golden but a muzzle works too.
  1. After the movie starts.
  2. When their retort is better than what you opened with.
  3. When you get pulled over by a cop.
    But officer!! (Did you just call me a butt?)
  4. When I say, DON'T SAY ANOTHER WORD.
    Fair warning imo.
  5. When you just got the baby to sleep.
  6. When you just tiptoed out of your 6 year olds room.
    After waiting a half hour just to be safe.
  7. When you're eavesdropping on an insane story and damn, you know they'll stop if they hear you.
    Don't. Even. Breathe.
  8. When the officiant starts with, Dearly Beloved, we are gathered here today...
    Even if you saw with your own eyes what happened at the bachelor party. Not my circus... 🙊
  9. When your phone rings and someone is napping upstairs.
    Decline and text. God I love technology.
  10. When you've talked till you're blue in the face.
    They're not listening and are seeing red. Since yellow really means stop, pause and don't go until things are green again.
  11. When your voice carries like a high pitched piccolo.
    That 'Til Tuesday song was about me.
  12. When you already put your foot in your mouth and there is NO turning back.
    Or so I've been told. 🙈
  13. Literal mic drop.
    🎤
  14. Giphy
    I hear that 😉