Wish List for Building the Perfect Friend

Getting judgmental here so read no further if you might be offended. My perfect friend is positive, knows everyday is a new beginning and above all, curious. So yes, I'm looking for another me.
  1. Not a Luddite
    Doesn't say stuff like, "I'm on Facebook but I never like or post anything" or "Online banking isn't safe" or "I'll never text" but posts on fb all day long. And get a decent phone-stop blaming everyone else for your garbled texts...
  2. Food wimps need not apply.
    Isn't a vegetarian, has no problem with gluten, peanuts, cilantro, mushrooms or cows milk.
  3. Married OK
    They can't be an ass though
  4. No poor me, victim types.
    I am there for you, good times and bad, always. You can vent and rant and curse the fates-I'll join you. Dysfunctional childhoods, illness, death, divorce, job loss-I've had it all. BTW, inspirational memes won't fix anything. Really.
  5. Likes coffee.
    Lots of it in the morning and occasionally a Starbucks or Peets later in the day.
  6. Equally happy with fast food and fine dining.
    Can find something tasty at Burger King, the local microbrewery menu or The Ritz-Carlton.
  7. Likes movies AND television
    Not a snob, doesn't make statements such as "I never watch TV" or I haven't rented or streamed a movie in 5 years"
  8. Kind to waiters, workers and even the TSA agents
    Most people are trying to do their jobs-keeping their boss happy and the customers. Can't abide rudeness by friends to clerks-a real deal breaker. And don't be a stingy tipper 😁
  9. Likes beer
    Not required but would be nice-we could road trip across California stopping and sipping.
  10. More to come...