LATE NIGHT QUESTIONS: JAN. 5 EDITION

I'm tired.
  1. Should I be better at geography?
  2. Who are the characters of Modern Family talking to when they monologue to the camera?
    I know there is most likely an easy answer to this. But what is it?
  3. Why did I get so many cat themed Christmas presents? Are people trying to tell me something?
  4. How do they make those tiny teacups pigs?
    And then how do you just have one and treat it like a pet? Does it cuddle? I don't get it.
  5. How do people take those quick two-minute showers?
    How does everything get done? Am I showering wrong?
  6. Where can I buy one of those bras that can hold a bottle of wine?