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You know you've experienced these horrors. Everyone has.
- •Your life flashes before your eyes as....Your toothbrush, your contacts, damn near anything goes careening off of the shelf in the general direction of the toilet.
- •You irrationally fear for your asshole as.....You drop the soap. In your own shower. By yourself. And you've never been to prison.
- •You imagine the horror of your naked (and out of shape) body being found by strangers when.....You loose your footing in the shower, even just for a second, and spend the next two minutes hyperventilating. And silently promising to go to church more. And the gym.