Things About the Subway I Know to Be True

  1. There should be a fine for man spreading
  2. No your bag should not be on that seat
  3. Neither should your jacket
  4. Oh by all means lean against the ENTIRE POLE
  5. Did I say your purse could rest against my thigh
  6. The guy sitting next to me is definitely reading this right now
  7. Stop reading
  8. I know what you're doing
  9. I'll smack you with my longchamp if you don't stop right now
  10. REALLY