Battle List: Pizza vs. Sushi

Winner is definitive and should never, ever be argued again. Add your own pros and cons/ point values in "suggestions"; list and final score will be amended to reflect compelling arguments. Annnd go.
  1. PIZZA: Is delicious.
    50 POINTS
  2. SUSHI: Is delicious.
    50 POINTS
  3. PIZZA: Averages out to about 275 calories per piece.
    10 POINTS
  4. SUSHI: Averages out to about 60 calories per piece (nigiri).
    25 POINTS
  5. PIZZA: Is beautiful to look at, with a colorful, spontaneous, Jackson Pollock feel.
    30 POINTS
  6. SUSHI: Is even more beautiful to look at, with an intricate, obsessive, ornate vibe, like a particularly awesome Mark Ryden painting.
    50 POINTS
  7. PIZZA: Is responsible for fun-loving movie scenes like Jeff Spicoli ordering delivery in "Fast Times at Ridgemont High"; John Travolta walking down the street, eating slices in "Saturday Night Fever"; Wayne shilling for Pizza Hut in "Wayne's World," etc. (Not to mention the "Louie" credits.)
    20 POINTS
  8. SUSHI: Is mostly seen in upscale or hipster movies, such as "Jiro Dreams of Sushi"; the sushi bar scenes in "Kill Bill"; "Notting Hill"; etc. (Although Molly Ringwald pulling out the sushi lunchbox in "Breakfast Club" is pretty fun.)
    15 POINTS
  9. PIZZA: Is populist and, in general, affordably priced. Cheap pizza is still good.
    35 POINTS
  10. SUSHI: Is expensive. And when cheap, is a mouthful of toenails and fishy shit.
    5 POINTS
  11. PIZZA: Is best shared with friends.
    25 POINTS
  12. SUSHI: Is best consumed with a row of strangers, staring straight ahead. And when you do have to share with friends, leads to a lot of smiling, clenched-teeth resentment: "No no no, go ahead. Have that last piece."
    5 POINTS
  13. PIZZA: Is great the next day.
    35 POINTS
  14. SUSHI: Has a shelf-life the length of a YouTube video entitled "The Wit and Wisdom of Dov Charney." (This line should be read out loud in a Johnny Carson voice.)
    NO POINTS
  15. PIZZA: Is best prepared by a friendly, perhaps overweight chef who joyously tosses the dough in the air while loudly singing "Il Canto Degli Italiana."
    30 POINTS
  16. SUSHI: Is best prepared by a rail-thin, emotionally-detached chef who, on a dime, may fly into a rage and eject you from the restaurant, even if you ARE Charlize Theron, which by the way I totally saw happen one night.
    15 POINTS
  17. PIZZA: Is just as good in its vegetarian and vegan forms.
    40 POINTS
  18. SUSHI: Is Dullsville in its vegetarian and vegan forms, as evidenced by the people eating it and saying, "This is just as good," while their eyes betray the sad truth.
    5 POINTS
  19. PIZZA: Never hurt nobody (except for all the fatness and sodium and all. Did you know 34% of the average American's body-fat is due to pizza?! Unbelievable).
    20 POINTS
  20. SUSHI: May be environmentally unsustainable, which is a huge downer because it's SO good. Especially eel. God, why does everything awesome have to destroy the the planet?
    NO POINTS
  21. PIZZA TOTAL: 310 POINTS
  22. SUSHI TOTAL: 205 POINTS
  23. WINNER: PIZZA
    Pizza is better than sushi. Again, this is totally definitive.
  24. NEXT BATTLE LIST: TELEVISION VS. BOOKS
  25. SUSHI: goes with sake AND beer, and eating relatively less means it's easier to get drunk. 35 points
    Suggested by   @kristopher
  26. PIZZA: kind of only goes with beer (or wine but only with fancy hipster artisanal pizza) and either way makes you super full and unable to drink. 15 points.
    Suggested by   @kristopher