Comic Books as a Kid That I Read, Ranked

Man, between this and the request about comic strips I loved, @eatthelove is getting me to nerd the fuck out! I declare 7th grade as the cutoff for me as a "kid" - so no X-Men on this list, or Watchmen, Dark Knight Returns... just the hardcore kid stuff. I've used images of comics I actually owned as much as possible. Great request, @eatthelove!
  1. 34.
    WAR COMICS
    Nothing was worse than getting stuck with a war comic. So boring! Sgt. Rock sucked!
  2. 33.
    WESTERN COMICS
    And Western comics... ugh! Jonah Hex has to be the ugliest (non-monster) guy ever to star in his own comic book.
  3. 32.
    FLASH
    The fastest man alive, and the dullest! Plus the artist, Carmine Infantino, drew scary faces that hurt to look at.
  4. 31.
    GREEN LANTERN
    He can make anything with the rays of his magic ring, so 90% of the time he just makes a big green fist or hammer and clonks someone over the head with it. (You'll notice that these lower rungs are pretty much exclusively stocked with DC titles. I was Marvel all the way!)
  5. 30.
    POWER GIRL
    Her comics were nothing special, but she singlehandedly justifies all of cosplay for me.
  6. 29.
    JUSTICE LEAGUE OF AMERICA
    I had this one, hilarious old issue where the Justice League looked in a fun house mirror, and got transformed into misshapen freaks. Because Green Arrow was now squat and broad, he had to hold his bow with his feet.
  7. 28.
    JUSTICE SOCIETY OF AMERICA
    Justice Society was a notch more interesting than Justice League because they were from Earth-2, a parallel world in the DC Universe. What I loved about Earth-2 was that the differences between their world and ours were so minimal as to be ridiculous. For example: The Superman of Earth-2 has... wait for it... GREYING TEMPLES. WOAHHHHHHHHH!!!
  8. 27.
    SUPERBOY AND THE LEGION OF SUPERHEROES
    Each issue, Superboy travels to the future, where there's a shitstorm of superheroes who all seem like they were conceived in a fifth grader's notebook (Bouncing Boy! Lightning Lad! etc.).
  9. 26.
    MARVEL SUPER SPECIALS
    These were magazine-sized specials that adapted popular, mega-crappy movies of the day (Jaws 2, Krull, Annie) or were devoted to rock bands (a Beatles history, or the famous KISS comic where the band fights Dr. Doom, and supposedly used their own blood for the comic's red ink!).
  10. 25.
    GOLD KEY COMICS
    Gold Key was an off-brand company that cranked out TV, cartoon and movie spinoff comics. Woody Woodpecker, Disney stuff, Star Trek... you'd find these at the department store, sold in plastic bags containing three comics for 99 cents. And you'd be fine with reading them, because no Internet.
  11. 24.
    CHARLTON COMICS
    Another cheap-jack company, but with genuinely cool concepts and young artists who went on to become comic book superstars (like John Byrne!). Charlton was like buying cheap weed that turns out to be pretty good weed.
  12. 23.
    CLASSICS ILLUSTRATED
    God, I loved these! I'd always find them at the thrift stores where my parents were buying my clothes. Just exactly what you'd think - comic book adaptations of classic literature. "The Prince and the Pauper" was my all-time favorite.
  13. 22.
    HARVEY COMICS
    Richie Rich, Casper the Friendly Ghost, Hot Stuff the Demon From Hell Who Was Cute... My little sister bought these, and I dismissed them as "for babies." Then I would steal them when she was done and read them obsessively. (BTW - the comic here is NOT from when I was a kid, but I just couldn't believe Richie Rich met NKOTB!)
  14. 21.
    GREAT, BIG, OVERSIZED "TREASURY EDITION" COMICS
    These were huge, bigger-than-an-issue-of-Rolling-Stone-sized comics devoted to big events, like Superman crossing over from DC to Marvel so he could fight Spider-Man, or Superman fighting Muhammad Ali. (It was a draw. It was always a draw.)
  15. 20.
    DEFENDERS
    Now we're getting into the good stuff. Defenders was a Marvel superhero team that was like the Avengers written by a mental patient. Because it WAS - a guy named Steve Gerber, who wrote storylines where the team's leader, Nighthawk, had his brain removed and placed in a deer; an elf with a gun popped up and murdered people with no explanation (and no follow-up); and all sorts of other stoner weirdness that melted my 70s kid mind.
  16. 19.
    CAPTAIN ATOM/ BLUE BEETLE
    An awesome Charlton series by the great Steve Ditko, a true hero of mine who basically created Spider-Man, Dr. Strange and other huge Marvel characters; lost his mind over Ayn Rand; turned his back on millions of dollars in Spider-Man profit; and now lives in seclusion, waiting until I write his biopic.
  17. 18.
    HOWARD THE DUCK
    Steve Gerber's greatest creation. Led to me drawing cartoon ducks all through high school. Almost cried with joy when he appeared at the end of "Guardians of the Galaxy."
  18. 17.
    DONALD DUCK
    Donald Duck artist Carl Barks is now considered one of the greatest storytellers in comics. I owned one issue by him as a kid and loved it so much, read it again and again.
  19. 16.
    INCREDIBLE HULK
    Hulk was so cool, but his comics never truly lived up to the promise. Like, you really just wanted page after page of him breaking stuff, but he would usually wander around the desert a lot, moping. I actually preferred the old TV show to the comics!
  20. 15.
    WHAT IF?
    This was a great series that posed questions like "What if Spider-Man joined the Fantastic Four?" or "What if Captain America became President?" The answer was almost always, "Well, everything would go to shit, and someone would die and it would be a huge bummer, so maybe you kids should stop writing us letters requesting stuff like that." Loved how each story was "hosted" by the Watcher - a big, bald baby-man who lives on the moon!
  21. 14.
    WONDER WOMAN
    I liked Wonder Woman but one time in fifth grade, I was afraid to buy the latest issue because it was "for girls." However, due to the fact that I have always been an incredibly brave warrior working to smash the gender paradigm, I worked up the courage to buy a copy at the 7-Eleven. The cashier said to the friend he was talking to, "Hold on just a moment while I ring up this little girl's purchase." D'oh!
  22. 13.
    DR. STRANGE
    Other than Spider-Man, the crown jewel of Steve Ditko's many masterworks. Can't wait to see Cumberbatch rock those spindly Ditko hands!
  23. 12.
    MICRONAUTS
    Tiny space travelers! I loved the toys and loved the comic even more. I don't know why I was so obsessed with this title. Just loved it!
  24. 11.
    MOON KNIGHT
    He was a Batman ripoff who had multiple personalities. Great costume! And really loved the recent, spooky reboot they did.
  25. 10.
    EC COMICS
    These are the notorious horror comics that got banned in the 1950s. I'd get my hands on any reprints I could find. The best art, great stories and I knew my Dad liked them as a kid, which made me feel connected to him.
  26. 9.
    TOMB OF DRACULA
    I liked spooky stuff a lot! I didn't always like Gene Colan as a superhero artist, but his Dracula was absolutely definitive!
  27. 8.
    CAPTAIN AMERICA
    Love Cap. Love every incarnation of him. Was excited that "Winter Soldier" finally did him justice.
  28. 7.
    SUPERMAN/ ACTION COMICS
    The Superman mythology is so great and primal and powerful that it made all the typically goofy DC stories worthwhile. (And nothing is funnier than the whole "Superdickery" thing online, of which this image is an example.)
  29. 6.
    TINTIN
    I discovered Tintin reprints in an old magazine called "Children's Digest" that was at a grandparent's house. Clean art forever! Captain Haddock is my favorite cartoon alcoholic!
  30. 5.
    ARCHIE
    My favorite title was "Life With Archie," where he would take on groovy 1970s social issues ("Gosh, Betty! That factory is polluting the river!").
  31. 4.
    BATMAN/ DETECTIVE COMICS
    Alternated between this costume and Darth Vader for most of my childhood.
  32. 3.
    FANTASTIC FOUR
    The only comic I ever subscribed to. I loved their family dynamic and found every single issue to be thrilling. (Beyond-nerdy reference: Fuck Herbie the Robot!)
  33. 2.
    AMAZING SPIDER-MAN
    The first comic book I ever read was a Spider-Man issue. I had a real debate over whether to give him the top spot on the list. Unbelievable that this character is STILL fun and exciting after 50 years. And keep shuffling actors, Hollywood - you'll never find anyone who can embody the awesomely whiny vulnerability that is Peter Parker!
  34. 1.
    MAD
    For the brilliant art, writing and for cracking the 20th century in half. My old reprints of the 1950s Mad comics were sacred texts. And the magazine, forget it. Life revolved around the new Mad coming out! Ahhhh fuck, I wish I was still a kid. (Except for, you know, all the horrifying parts. Just the comic book parts!)