THINGS THAT HAVE OCCURRED IN MY HOMETOWN SINCE I DEPARTED

Ranked by how sad I am that I missed it
  1. A moth epidemic
    There were more moths than there had ever been I guess? I got snapchat videos of them covering the outside of houses. I am NOT sad to have missed it.
  2. The weird clown thing?
    All that nonsense with the clowns that I'm still confused about??? Idk there was a threat at one of our high schools and my friends saw clowns and they were scared. I am also NOT sad to have missed it
  3. A small scale earthquake
    It was a 3.1 on the Richter scale. Might've been cool to experience? I'm unsure. I'm a LITTLE sad to have missed it because I was out of town for the last one too and I've always wanted to know how it felt.
  4. Donald Disgusting Trump visited my university
    WTF GET THAT SCUM OFF MY HOMETOWN PROPERTY HIS PRESENCE THERE PROBABLY RUINED ALL MY HAPPY MEMORIES IM SO ANGRY HE SAID SUCH TRASHCAN THINGS. I AM SO HAPPY I WAS OUT OF THE COUNTRY SO THAT I WAS NOWHERE NEAR THAT FILTH OF A MAN