Lies I Tell

on a daily basis
  1. How my weekend was
    "Fine," I say, trying not to grin as I recall coming up with just the right accent for the voice I use when I'm pretending of be my cat. It was better than fine.
  2. Who I date
    "Oh he was a friend of a friend." I swiftly change the subject as I want to keep my fling with a high school crush we mutually know a secret because if I don't it will lose its magic.
  3. What I do in my free time
    "Oh, same old, same old." I shove my recently completed screenplay based on my misadventures as a rides operator at a theme park deeper into my bag.
  4. How I feel
    "I'm doing well!" This is true unless I'm in love with the barista who made my mocha the perfect temperature or if I'm baffled by other drivers or distractedly curious due to a half-finished podcast or enraged that a radio dj interrupted a song before it finished entirely...
  5. My name (at coffee shops)
    "Ella," I say, hoping my tone doesn't betray me. I wonder if the barista noticed that I've given him a different name the last 4 times I've been here. Does he have my real name memorized? Does he even know I've been here before? Does everyone lie about their name?
  6. That I've got it together/am a hot mess
    Usually the opposite of what I say is how it really is.