THOUGHTS FROM A HINDI MOVIE I CAN'T UNDERSTAND

I went to see a movie with the family. It's a holiday. We're all out together. I see Bollywood movies occasionally when family wants to go. I never understand what's being said (I don't speak enough Hindi), but movies are pretty easy to grasp.
  1. The main titles are in English. The movie is in Hindi. This makes no sense.
  2. Main character is supposed to be French. This guy is definitely Indian. Makes no sense.
  3. He speaks French with an Indian accent.
  4. He speaks Hindi with an Indian accent.
  5. Why is that girl's robe see-through? What's the point of wearing a robe you can see straight through?
  6. 18 years just passed. No one aged a day.
  7. It wouldn't be a Bollywood movie without a good dance number.
    This one is in a club.
  8. This movie is a lot of music over sequences of this guy just walking around.
  9. Why does this French guy speak Hindi so well? And these Thai people too? Makes no sense.
  10. This movie has no plot.
  11. Is it just me?
  12. Maybe it's because I can't understand the Hindi... Maybe it does have a plot.
  13. People don't silence their phones in India.
  14. That guy is texting.
  15. That person's phone is ringing.
  16. She just answered it!
  17. No phone etiquette here.
  18. Someone behind me is watching a video on his phone. He isn't bothering to turn down the volume.
  19. I don't really think this movie is going anywhere.
  20. It can't be just me.
  21. Oh good! Chachi (husband's aunt) is saying it's pointless too.
  22. We're leaving?
  23. We haven't even reached intermission.
    Movies in India have intermission. For American movies they just awkwardly stop them at the middle.
  24. Everyone is saying it's pointless and plotless now.
  25. We're leaving!
  26. Yay!
  27. Now I don't have to sit through a movie I can't understand anymore!!!