After my cat spent an hour in the hall singing the song of her people, I couldn't get back to sleep. So I browsed my phone. And have to say I now feel like a pretty terrible human. So, @mnickwrites this is my honest rebuttal, off the top of my head.
  1. I paid for the Italy trip for years, literally and figuratively. My mother did not in fact pay a dime of it except for the lovely plate she got me as a gift while we were there. Which I still got crap for, for some reason. And what was supposed to be a wonderful trip to Umbria became a huge Mother's Day fight.
    I spent ten days away from my 3-yr old to spend some QT with my mom, aunt & brother- who all got to stay in the castle, while my brother (who was in charge of planning) decided to stick me out in the middle of nowhere, without a car, in a villa with people I'd never met. After asking to change rooms, this fight ended with me overhearing his wife telling our family I just like to cause drama and Mark yelling at me and our mom "at least you can choose your wife; you can't choose your family."
  2. The baton ACCIDENT didn't follow a fight at all, it actually came on the heels of us goofing around.
    We were laughing/being stupid and our mom had just literally said to calm down and stop horsing around before someone got hurt. She told us to go our separate ways, which we did. And to be funny, on the way to my room down the hall I said, "Hey Mark, think fast!" then faked like I was going to throw the baton at him. At which point the old rubber end flicked off and flew down the hall, nailing him in the nose. There was blood and yelling, and I broke my favorite bracelet cleaning up the blood.
  3. I'm pretty sure my cousin broke his leg doing stunts on his new bmx bike.
    I have zero recollection of this ever happening, and I would never close the garage door on anyone. Jesus. I think one time it maybe accidentally closed on one of the cats, which is probably when my dad got the sensor that keeps the door from closing if anything is blocking it.
  4. I didn't ask to be the only girl or the youngest for that matter.
    Growing up with a brother and one male cousin wasn't my choice, but it was either eat or be eaten. I did what I could to hold my own. But I can assure you, there was no malice involved. Accidents, yes. Childhood squabbles, yes. But in many of my brother's stories involving things breaking after doors slammed shut in his face, you might realize that I was the one being chased every time. Once, he even forced the door open over my toe, completely skinning it while my poor mom was teaching piano.
  5. The earrings I helped pick out
    Having never met the woman who would become his ex wife, I had no idea what her taste in jewelry was like. But I do remember thinking this one pair of earrings was really pretty (I think they had some sort of mother of pearl design in them, I don't exactly remember). But I thought if someone had gotten them as a gift for me, I would have been thrilled. I think it's really crappy she never wore them.
  6. Singapore might have something to do with it
    The Italy trip wasn't the reason my brother missed out on a majority of his nephew's younger years... It might have more to do with the fact that he lived in Asia until 2011. And oh yeah, we all live in Dayton.
  7. The advent calendar
    I didn't take bites out of the chocolates and put them back- we both opened doors ahead of schedule, ate the chocolate out of them, then closed the doors again to hide our crimes. Upon discovery, my mother questioned us as to who was pre-eating the advent candy, to which we both expressed extreme and vehement denial. At which point she threatened to call the police "since apparently someone had broken into our house and eaten the advent chocolate." Confession ensues. Mom wins again.
  8. I guess those two lists made me sad because...
    I just got back from a pretty fun trip to Houston to visit my brother, and I really thought we were getting along pretty dang well as adults, aside from several isolated incidents. And far from saying we have very different personalities, as he claims, I have always been proud to say I think I'm a lot like my big brother.