WHAT I WANTED TO BE GROWING UP, CHRONOLOGICALLY

Missed opportunities
  1. Olympic gymnast
  2. Rhythmic gymnast
    Clearly there was a time when I was somewhat obsessed with the Olympics and sparkly things...
  3. Librarian
  4. Diane Keaton in "Baby Boom"
    Wear all the power suits in NYC. "Country Baby is not for sale!"
  5. Ice skater
    The Olympics must've been back on. My town finally built a skating rink when I was in college, which is essentially the age people stop being competitive ice skaters. Thanks, Springfield.
  6. Actor
    Remind me to tell you about the time I bombed an audition for Peter Pan.
  7. Elementary art teacher
    Because I was starting to adult and I didn't wanna.
  8. Interior Designer
  9. Journalist
  10. Own a store that sold bath products and dip mixes
    Called "Take A Dip"