It's totally chill if I do. We can still hang.
  1. Do you have a library card?
  2. Can you cook at least three simple meals (scrambled eggs and microwave hot dogs count)?
  3. Is there a clear path in your bedroom between the door and your bed where you don't have to step over anything?
  4. IF ALL YESES: Congratulations, you are not pathetic.
  5. IF ONE OR MORE NOS: Get ahold of yourself.