TIMES SHOP KEEPERS HAVE SHAMED ME

  1. 1.) Snooty Starbucks Barista
    I asked her to type up my credit card number since the strip on mine didn't work any more. "Too much shopping, I guess!" I said in what I thought was an ironic tone, to which the barista (who, I feel it's important to note, had dreadlocks) responded "Yeah, rampant capitalism is hilarious..." The wait for my tall strawberry acai refresher was one of the longest two minutes of my life.
  2. 2.) Music Masters
    I went up to the register with a casingle of "Relax"(b/w Two Tribes) by Frankie Goes to Hollywood and Love Resurrection by Alison Moyet. I got my wallet out and the shop keeper raised his hand in protest "Nobody wants these, not even ironically, I'd feel bad making you pay." I'm kind of conflicted on this one: On one hand, free vinyl! But on the other... What a diss!
  3. 3.) Yankee Candle
    "You put that candle in your backpack!" - Mean Candle Lady, 2007. I most certainly did not. And to this day, that experience has put me off scented candles.
  4. 4.) Sushi Nori
    This one was a real betrayal. I love sushi. And for a long time, my favorite place to get it was Sushi Nori, a tiny kiosk-sized sushi bar in the Yorktown Mall food court. I know what all you food snobs are thinking - "Mall sushi? Gross." But this stuff was the real deal, and cheap too. I became a regular, and even built up a rapport with the cashier. She even had my order memorized. Then one day, i came in and she said "Oh... Sushi again? Twice in one day?" I've never been so ashamed.