THINGS I HAVE PURCHASED ONE DAY BEFORE MY MOTHER-IN-LAW CAME TO VISIT

Her name is Carol and she drinks tea every day at 3:00 pm and thinks the color salmon "is just so flattering" on my husband.
  1. Sugar and creamer holders
    She literally pours cream and sugar into smaller bowls before serving coffee or tea. EVERY DAY. Even when she is by herself.
  2. Cloth napkins
    I'm pretty sure that's why God gave us sleeves on our shirts, but I'm from Alabama and sometimes you've ripped the sleeves off you favorite NASCAR shirt and run out of paper towels, so I guess napkins do serve a purpose.
  3. 400 thread count sheets
    She would know if they were less.
  4. Healthy cereal
    Cause we don't just eat frosted mini wheats, okay?
  5. A luggage rack for the spare bedroom
    Because I am THAT sophisticated, obvi
  6. A collection of over-priced, organic, scentless bath products
    Carol has sensitive skin, y'all