Inspired by @TQ and those after him, but, y'know, the opposite for obvious reasons…
  1. I'm still on my parents' insurance
    This is not a complaint
  2. I don't remember a time without cell phones and internet
    This is definitely not a complaint
  3. I'm only able to vaguely remember where I was on 9/11
    All I really remember is that I was at school and we had to leave early