BEST PARTS OF J LO'S "THE BOY NEXT DOOR" (SPOILERS)
You should without a doubt see this movie immediately.
- •"I can't forget it, it's burned into my mind forever."Jennifer Lopez, re her husband cheating on her. As soon as she finishes saying this, she sits down to eat a piece of pie.
- •"You've got schmutz on your shirt."Apparently Jennifer Lopez's character Claire Peterson is Jewish?
- •"But he's the best allergist in the valley!"J Lo to her son, when her son would rather hang out with hot new neighbor Noah than go to the doctor.
- •"Noah is staying with me to help out when I get my bone marrow transport." "You mean transplant, Uncle Bob."
- •"This is a first edition! I can't accept this."When Noah gives J Lo a first edition copy of The Iliad. A FIRST EDITION COPY OF THE ILIAD?!
- •"Laugh a lot, take off your wedding ring, give him head."Kristin Chenoweth's advice to J Lo, as she gets ready for her first date since her husband cheated on her.
- •"Ethan, how's your mom?" "Gallstones."
- •When Noah wears a necktie to go target shooting in the woods.
- •"I'm busy with physical education. I believe you're familiar with that subject, right?"Noah to J Lo, when she confronts him in the school's giant boxing gym they apparently have.
- •"The Wiz was on Turner Classics last night. It's a black version of The Wizard of Oz."Taunt a bully uses to upset J Lo's son (who once peed his pants when he had an allergy attack after being stung by a bee).
- •When J Lo has only five minutes to search Noah's house for their sex tape he's hiding, and her first instinct is to look behind the painting on the mantle.
- •"One more question... was this a 2006 minivan?" "Yes, that's exactly what it was."
- •When Noah is intensely torturing Kristin Chenoweth and there's a random cat sitting on the counter grooming itself.
- •When J Lo takes down Noah with AN EPI PEN TO THE EYEBALLIn the midst of a burning barn