1. "Love and welding have a lot in common."
  2. "Love you, I'll see you soon." (said to a bonsai tree)
  3. "Stretch my groin."
  4. "I vividly remember waking up in the hospital after being in a coma for a day and a half."
  5. "I'm all horned up right now. I'm all horned up, everybody!"
  6. "Why am I not raping you right now?"
  7. "Is this the gay Bachelor?"
  8. "I pulled up in a hot tub vehicle."
  9. "You do suck, by the way."
  10. "He's in a cupcake!"