THINGS I THINK ABOUT WHEN SITTING ALONE AT A BAR WAITING FOR MY FRIEND TO SHOW UP TO DINNER

She's 45 minutes late.
  1. How to make new friends
  2. How to appear like I DEFINITELY have friends despite my lonely appearance
  3. Wondering how the room is reacting to my shark dress
  4. Wondering why I'm wearing a shark dress
  5. This Moscow Mules is tight tho
  6. 10 more please, bartender!
  7. Hi. I like you're man bun.
  8. Fin.
  9. But actually please hurry.