1. Pam Beesly
    I think if I worked at Dunder Mifflin, Pam and I would bond over being the hip, young, sane ones. She's a low key good time, which would balance out my showboating. Also, I'm always down for a fashion show at lunch.
  2. Brett
    I met this girl at a pregame. Her name is Brett. She has red hair, a leather jacket, and a cool vibe. She taught me how to play a drinking game without being an asshat - a rare feat. We will probably never meet again.
  3. Wayne Brady
    The generation gap would quickly fade I into the distance as Wayne realizes what a useful best friend/sidekick I would be. I appreciate him. I legitimately believe he is one of the most talented people alive and could do anything he sets his mind to. That's important to friendship.
  4. Jay
    A theatre professor I had in London. I love over-sharers, and Jay immediately told the whole class about his boyfriend and their green card struggles. He likes arguments as much as I do. We met in the wrong context, but I haven't given up on this one yet.
  5. Current SNL females
    Aidy, Kate, Cecily, and Sasheer. A great way to test this would to be to put me on the writing staff. I'm great in a team. My greatest weakness is that I work too hard.