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- •A small child sneezed on me multiple times in church
- •I voluntarily went to church because it just seemed like a Good Thing To Do
- •All in all I had a very underwhelming experience at church
It's really difficult to be me.
- •Register for classesIt's a gross injustice that Philosophy Of Religious Thought and Advanced Fiction & Poetry Writing are both at the same time. How do you expect me to make a choice like this?
- •Declare a double majorAs if declaring one major in the humanities wasn't bad enough, now I have to fill out forms to declare a second one, so my degree can be twice is irrelevant.
- •Prepare for the coming Midwest WinterI'm going to have to buy so many sweaters at Goodwill to ready my winter wardrobe. That way I can still look intelligent when I trudge to Modernist Literatures in subzero temperatures.
- •Plan study abroadUgh, I can't believe I have to fill out all these stupid forms, just so I can spend a semester in a foreign country earning college credit and having life-changing experiences.
I had to read The Sun Also Rises for my English class and I'm still mad.
- •WomenEveryone is either a prostitute, unhappily married, or crazy. People make fun of them for being either too feminine or not feminine enough. Ernest thinks it's cool and edgy that he buys a prostitute dinner in chapter 2 but guess what? It's not.
- •LonelinessErnest Hemingway thinks being lonely is this profound thing that only happens to men who were in The War and don't know what to do with themselves afterwards. And they solve this problem by hating women and wandering around Europe in search of Absinthe to wash down breakfast with.
- •RacismThe line "it's enough to make a man want to join the Klan" pretty much sums it up.
- •Sentence StructureRun-on sentences are boring and pointless and annoying and exhausting and hard to read and in poor taste.