GRANNY'S FACEBOOK ADVENTURES

NaLiWriMo day 9
  1. 1.
    My grandma was anti-FB for years
    It was the usual, "Why do you want to put your whole life in a public space" and so on. Also the superior, "I don't need Facebook to know your birthdays!" Touche, Gram.
  2. 2.
    Grandma is stubborn
    At 76, she seems to feel that she has paid her dues to society and that she now gets to be as stubborn as she wants to.
  3. 3.
    Grandma is kind of a tech wizard for her age
    She's a bright spark in general. She wanted to be a nurse after completing high school but was forbidden (1950s issues). So she worked in finances in the local hospital. She had to stay on top of tech. Adaptable.
  4. 4.
    So when she got her first smartphone, she did what we all do:
    Ignored the manual and figured it out herself. Then downloaded a million bajillion apps.
  5. 5.
    Imagine my surprise when I got a friend request from dear Gramma!
    No you freak, how dare you steal my granny's identity! I'm reporting you! Oh... Its really you, Gran? Oops...
  6. 6.
    She had set up her own Facebook.
    She had decided that Facebook was cool now.
  7. 7.
    Gran is an A-grade FB stalker.
    My daily notifications are something like GRAN LIKED YOUR PHOTO FROM 1991. I don't even know where she digs them up.
  8. 8.
    But I realised she doesn't really understand the concept of a timeline.
    "Why does Jane send me these pictures? I don't want them on my profile!" I regularly have to explain that they are NOT on her profile, but on her newsfeed.
  9. 9.
    "Gran checked in to your hometown"
    This popped up on my newsfeed a while ago. What, are you in town Gran?! No, no... She just checked in because she could.
  10. 10.
    "Gran volunteered at Doctors Without Borders"
    No you didn't, Gran! "I know I know, but I like them, it makes me look fun..". Well, at least she's honest about her intentions.
  11. 11.
    "Gran reported your photo"
    Gran! What did you do that for? "I told you not to upload that photo of me, I don't like it."
  12. 12.
    But most recently she asked me to delete some of her friends...
    ... Because they were sharing nasty pictures.
  13. 13.
    Gran had some SERIOUSLY weird "friends" on Facebook.
    Like... The kind of people who terrify even me.
  14. 14.
    "Gran, why did you accept these people if you didn't know them?"
    "Well, they wouldn't let me see their information unless I accepted their requests!!"
  15. 15.
    I realised then: we never taught her the rules of social media
    Even her cell phone number was public on her profile, FFS.
  16. 16.
    I went on an intensive teach-gran-all-the-things spree
    And from now on I'll be keeping a closer eye on her shenanigans.