HOW I'VE GROWN AS A DRINKER

I like to think I've evolved...
  1. Alcoholic lemonade and other fruity hooches
    Almost like they're designed to get children into the booze life
  2. Malibu and pineapple
    A bootleg pina colada
  3. Southern comfort and lemonade
    One night only
  4. Vodka and coke
    Tastes like a shit uni disco
  5. Vodka and Irn Bru
    Served slightly warm in a balloon glass
  6. Vodka cranberry
    The taste of the 90s
  7. Bud light
    Or any beer that didn't taste of beer
  8. Lemon drop shots
    Nope
  9. Cosmopolitans
    So classy. So sticky. So spillable.
  10. Gin and tonics
  11. Gin and tonics (dry)
    Tonic is actually horrible
  12. Gin and soda
    Lovely
  13. Gin martinis
    For when you mean business
  14. Old Fashioneds
    For when you're feeling rich, and very patient
  15. Bourbon rocks
    Gets the job done. Impresses patronising boys.
  16. Jamesons rocks
    Ditto
  17. Dioralyte before bed and another one in the morning
    Time to evaluate booze consumption vs hideousness of hangover
  18. Gin and soda
    Hello old friend. Gotta start thinking hydration
  19. Vodka soda
    So boring but less chance of a hangover
  20. Sherry
    Taking small sips from tiny glasses, I'm officially your granny
  21. Gin and Dubonnet
    Good enough for the Queen Mum (two before lunch), good enough for me, but only at Christmas
  22. Tea and an early night
    I've paid my dues, got nothing to prove. Thanks alcohol, it's been a blast.