Because #allthat just isn't cutting it anymore. Shout out to Project Gutenburg's 1811 Dictionary in the Vulgar Tongue and Mental Floss for the help.
  1. Bottom Fact
    An absolute truth. How else will the chuckaboos believe your Canterbury story if you don't preface it by saying it's a bottom fact?
  2. Flam
    To trick or deceive. Leave nincumpoops in spiflicated silence when you hit them with this one
  3. Jammiest bits of jam
    The world is filled with people that bang up to the elephant. This is the best phrase to get that point across. Side note, let's bring back "bang up to the elephant" while we're at it
  4. Podsnappery
    "A willful determination to ignore the objectionable or inconvenient while at the same time assuming airs of superior virtue and noble recognition". Feeling out at elbow? Want that cork-brain to get out of your business? Deploy a little podsnappery and the world won't be able to tell you anything.