Five Things My 14-year-old Self Would Never Ever Believe Even if I Could Somehow Magically Tell Him
- •Adults are, to a very substantial degree, faking it. And I mean most of the time.
- •Corollary: When adults order you to do something and you actually do it, they are secretly amazed because they know that their "authority" is a tissue of lies.
- •Girls will basically never get less baffling. I know you're staking everything on the hope that some moment of adult clarity will someday somehow be visited upon you. Sorry.
- •That bravado thing you do? I'm talking about you and your friends. Your male friends. You know, where you go swaggering shoulder-to-shoulder down the street being loud? You should stop it. Because trust me, it doesn't look good on you and you're the only ones who don't get it.
- •Math is handy, sure, but let's not go overboard on the thing.