Who Did Your Mama Warn You to Watch Out For?

Real (but interesting) answers only, please.
  1. The devil
    Suggested by   @jeremysomething
  2. People who don’t genuinely like you and are trying to use you just to advance themselves. These people tend to not care whether or not you end up hurt in the process.
    Suggested by   @altruisticgirl
  3. The muscular jocks in high school. Per her advice: "the skinny nerds, they're the ones who won't use you. They'll love you forever, and they won't get fat."
    Suggested by   @angeliaheimsoth
  4. Jealous men
    Suggested by   @cmschoder
  5. Neiman Marcus
    Honestly. She HATED that store with a passion. I've never been inside one.
    Suggested by   @Waz
  6. Unfortunately, "blondes"
    My mother is a victim of internalized misogyny and a lifelong brunette
    Suggested by   @drugs
  7. Children that are walked using a leash
    Suggested by   @LordOfHillside
  8. My mom didn't let me join a soccer team because ~lesbians~ (joke was on her though because guess why I wanted to join the soccer team?)
    Suggested by   @gremlin
  9. Martha Stewart, she hated her because, "that bitch can do everything" even though we know it's mostly the assistants.
    Suggested by   @elmospimpingme
  10. NyQuil, Benadryl, and any other drugs containing the antihistamine doxylamine succinate, because studies show it is associated with dementia.
    Suggested by   @gabimoskowitz
  11. Men in trench-coats behind the bushes in the park
    Actually encountered 3 of them as a kid and my dad beat 2 of them up when he heard about it
    Suggested by   @cmschoder
  12. Men in bow-ties.
    Suggested by   @sarahmccoy
  13. The man in the white panel van.
    Apparently kidnapping kids in my area circa 1987.
    Suggested by   @jessicaz
  14. People grabbing your ass
    A lesson learned by age 13, as well as how to shame them in public (cuss them out, loudly). Has worked each unfortunate time it has occurred
    Suggested by   @dreadpiratemama
  15. People who say 'hey, how are you?' and don't wait to hear your answer.
    To see if they really care return the question - 'I'm good and you?' There's been many people who have stopped listening by then.
    Suggested by   @shaniceb23
  16. The sun.
    Only interesting because it was the only thing I remember any real warnings about.
    Suggested by   @StuckOnThe7
  17. People who behave way too good to you
    Just in case of being stabbed in the back. Yet it is still hard to be wise, mom.
    Suggested by   @fromhyewon
  18. People who smoked dope.
    Turns out that Mom smoked dope.
    Suggested by   @pili_ervin
  19. Apple Skin
    Because a kid in her school died in their sleep choking on apple skin. It was really drilled into my brain that even now at 23 I'm too scared to eat an apple anywhere near bedtime. I also feel the need to tell anyone I see grab an apple late at night.
    Suggested by   @ErinFlaherty
  20. Anyone the family dog didn't like.
    We trusted the dog's instincts without question.
    Suggested by   @DG
  21. Bad tippers
    A date who tips poorly is a huge red flag, always check the bill after he paid so you know. This was actually excellent advice.
    Suggested by   @ameliaville
  22. People who wanted me to watch the little mermaid.
    I wasn't allowed as Ariel defied her father, wore a two piece suit ( uh she's a mermaid) and lived with a man she didn't know.
    Suggested by   @bsizzle33
  23. Clarissa (of Clarissa Explains It All)
    My mom told me she was a smart aleck and not to get any ideas.
    Suggested by   @marykathryn
  24. "strangers and ugly boys"
    Suggested by   @emilysorrells
  25. White moms who let their kids eat hot dogs more than once a week.
    Suggested by   @yasi_mousavi
  26. Strangers
    Cliche but for real she was paranoid. "Don't go anywhere by yourself always be with a friend don't trust anyone people are fake af"
    Suggested by   @janessa24
  27. Hockey players
    She really wanted me to avoid dating them in high school. "Football players are fine, but please don't date a hockey player." Theater geeks were never mentioned.
    Suggested by   @colls39
  28. Ice cream trucks
    Supposedly a child had been kidnapped by a driver. Now looking back, she might've just made the whole thing up.
    Suggested by   @caropars
  29. F*cking idiots
    I remember coming home from school one day after witnessing my first case of two boys bullying another girl. I was shocked and I told my mom about it and asked her why they did it. I remember her answer very clearly: "Because they're fucking idiots honey, that's way. Please never become a fucking idiot and stay as far away from them as possible." And so I did.
    Suggested by   @cheryltunt
  30. The kid next door who openly told us about all of his moms sex toys
    Now that's just classic childhood
    Suggested by   @BennyMac92
  31. Italian men
    Suggested by   @DanielaM
  32. Myself.
    You'll give yourself the worst and best advice. Choose wisely.
    Suggested by   @GramsMadison
  33. All of my friends older brothers and the undertow.
    Suggested by   @lorimcs
  34. People who watched porn
    When I was in middle school, my mom found out that my friend watched porn from his mom. She banned me from hanging out with him because she thought he would show me porn. Lol
    Suggested by   @lesliekim3
  35. The cast of The Facts of Life
    She thought they were always scheming and plotting to get themselves out of trouble, and she didn't want me to be taking any notes on how to do that. 😝
    Suggested by   @madebytofu
  36. Skinny men with goatees.
    She never explained why, and one of my worst fears is that I'll find out one day.
    Suggested by   @paul_m
  37. People who won't eat ice cream if it's cold outside
    It's never too cold for ice cream. Ever
    Suggested by   @christine14932
  38. Anyone offering you something for free...there must be an ulterior motive. As recently as 2 days ago she sent me something saying people were handing out key fobs for you to try & win a car & clearly there are tracking devices in them so they can follow you and kill you.
    Suggested by   @andlamb
  39. People who were offering drives home and didn't know "The password"
    She didn't tell me what the password was though, for fear that I would tell somebody
    Suggested by   @BlaiseTheGuy
  40. Men with a smaller waistline than you...
    "Don't date a man with a smaller waistline than you - you'll look bigger"
    Suggested by   @genalwatson
  41. People that run charities.
    My parents(and others) worked very hard to raise money to build our neighborhood school, but after it was built, Mom said the only people involved were "real jerks, who made it all about them and not the school". This made me very dismissive of charities until I was about 30.
    Suggested by   @PassiveAggressor
  42. Men from Bordeaux
    This is from my grandmother and we don't know the story behind but I kinda think it's true... Don't trust them!
    Suggested by   @solena
  43. People on a spiritual path who weren't able to think for themselves.
    Sheep in a word. My mom is very spiritual and was part of a few movements but she always did what she wanted, followed her instincts. Many of her friends would blindly follow a "master" even when said master was clearly testing how far they would go before realizing they shouldn't listen to him without thinking by themselves.
    Suggested by   @solena
  44. People who are petty
    Especially with their time and money
    Suggested by   @DawnCloud
  45. People who would grab my ponytail and pull me to the ground when I was walking alone at night. Lesson: always wear your hair down so you don't get attacked.
    Suggested by   @eileen