I'M LATE BECAUSE...MY TOP 9 REASONS
I know it's not a great characteristic and I'm not proud of it, but I'm always late. Always. Except to work (well...) or to catch the Megabus (gotta get that window seat).
- 1.The snooze button is my favorite of the buttons
- 2.I said 10 minutes, but that's code for 20-30. Blame it on my shitty math skills, I guess
- 3.I fucked up my eyeliner. Again.
- 4.The CTA doesn't run on my schedule. I miss a lot of buses & trains. Cabs & Uber can suck it...you will never get my $$!!🙅🏻
- 5.I was picking out what to wear...& I LITERALLY couldn't decide (read as Chris Traeger aka Rob Lowe on Parks & Rec)
- 6.I wanted to finish my drink but didn't want to chug. My old ass is past that shit 👵🏼
- 7.I fell asleep. Fak!
- 8.I can't help that Netflix & Hulu automatically play the next episode
- 9.I NEEDED TO EAT SOMETHING!!